two wheels

My dad ran behind his six-year-old daughter, a dishtowel wrapped around the back of my banana-seat to hoist me up as I tipped.  Around and around the block he ran, while I yelled, "don't let go!"  Suddenly I didn't hear him breathing  behind my shoulder.  I looked, crashed, and cried indignantly, "you let go!"  

He saw that I could do it, and had confidence in me that I didn't yet have in myself.  That, and he was tired of running.

Flash forward to my life as a parent.  Obi-1, who is nearly 5, has been itching to ride a "two wheeler."  Our neighbor boy, "Li'l Joe," and his family introduced us to family biking.  I think it's fair to say they've encouraged Mr. Kenobi's commute-by-bike, showing confidence that he could do it long before we were certain.  They loaned us little bikes when all we thought necessary for a 2 year old's riding pleasure was a tricycle.  Once Obi-1 watched his friend take off on a 2-wheeler, he immediately wanted to do the same.  For two weeks, we've been trying to teach him patience, though not very successfully!  

And so you can imagine Saturday evening, while the neighborhood kids were all out riding up and down the block on scooters and bikes, that Obi-1 again asked to ride a 2-wheeler.  Without so much as a second thought, Li'l Joe's dad got up and went to his garage, returning with a smaller 2-wheeled bike.  I was skeptical, but gave Obi-1 the go-ahead to get on.  However, I looked to my neighbor and said something about hoping we didn't spend the evening in the emergency room.  

Fortunately, Obi-1 didn't share my lack of confidence.  He pushed himself along by foot for a few yards, then pulled up his feet and pedaled.  Within a few more yards, he was riding.  Mr. Kenobi and I didn't even have to leave our lawn chairs.

Sometimes you need somebody else to believe in you.  Other times, you have to just believe in yourself.

hired help

"Mama, be careful on the stairs."  

Hmm?  I absentmindedly responded to Obi-1 as I tried to find the best way to fix ribs for this evening's dinner.   Then, as if from far away, he said it again & caught my attention.

"Be careful on the stairs.  We just washed them."

This echoes the things I tell the boys when I've just finished scrubbing the hardwood stairs.  My mind races to track back through the conversation we had minutes ago...

"Boys, Mama needs your help.  We have friends coming over and I need to finish the recipe and get things cleaned up before Daddy gets home..."

I was sure I asked them to pick up their superhero costumes.  Sure of it.  Perhaps I did, but they decided to "help" by scrubbing the stairs.  I think they're wearing the superhero capes, which means they did  pick them up.  And the stairs undoubtably should be scrubbed, though they weren't on the urgent last-minute cleaning list.

In about two seconds I had raced into the front hall to survey the project.   Obi-1 held the special washcloth I use to scrub my face, a bit sudsy and dripping from his hand, and there was a puddled trail down the stairs and through the hall.  The stairs were thoroughly soaked from wall to rail, including the landing at the top.  Obi-2 held another washcloth, similarly drippy, and pointed to the stack of videos that were barricading traffic from the freshly washed stairs.

It turns out they used my (expensive, of course) foaming face cleanser for the project.  They dutifully filled washcloths with water, squirted a generous amount of cleanser on top, and trekked down the stairs to wash.

I must admit, they are clean now.  It took only a quick mop with a towel to clear the puddles, and a fresh scent of hypo-allergenic, anti-aging cleanser now greets my guests.   I'm sure it's a good thing for those 97-year-old wood floors. 

Considering the cost of this hired help, I can't complain.  

give em what they want

Dancing is to the eye

what music is to the ear.

~ Marjorie Forney, dance arts pioneer

I'm teaching dance this week at a local arts camp.  While I've assisted in a few classes over the past decade, this is the first time I've pulled out my ballet slippers in the great northwest.  Let's just say it was exciting but uncomfortable!  Uncomfortable mostly because of the wardrobe challenges: either the shoes and clothes are smaller, or I am bigger. Um, yeah.  Like that's a question. 

Anyway, about 22 kids signed up for "dance" class.  The brochure had a sentence about creative movement and introductory dance when describing my classes.  Evidently this was widely read as "hip hop dances" by the young students.  While they seem to be having fun in spite of this, I've been mildly amused at the parents who've let me know they were surprised their children were getting "ballet instead of hip hop."

"I'm excited she's getting ballet.  It's just that we thought she was going to learn some new hip hop dances.  But ballet is great.  Really."

First, folks, it's hardly ballet.  If it were ballet, there would be technique.  And bars.  And mirrors.  Have I mentioned I don't need mirrors?   Moreover, I wouldn't teach ballet to sweet, unsuspecting, introductory "art camp" kids.  I've safely proven (in my mother's studio) that I'm a strict ballet teacher, even for trained students. 

So, I'm teaching creative movement.  It's a simple combination of basic ballet, jazz, and modern technique, to give them a small taste of dance.  A wide variety of music inspires them to move with lots of rhythms, instruments, and musicality.  I hope they'll finish the week with some safe ways to warm up their muscles, several basic movements (and vocabulary) from different dance disciplines, a few short pieces of choreography, and some basic performance and theater etiquette.  Most of all, I hope they have an overwhelming urge to put on some music and dance!

What I'm not teaching is hip hop.  When done well, it's incredibly technical and impressive.  However, it's not my area of expertise and it's not something that is well taught in a 5-day kids' camp.  Let me be clear: I do not oppose hip hop dance.  In fact, I have a healthy appreciation for the cultural and artistic contribution it has provided the dance world.  That said, there are a few problems with me teaching hip hop dance to this group of 1st - 6th graders:

1.  Skill Levels.  Most of my week's students have little to no dance background.  Hip hop quickly leads to injuries if done poorly.  In this type of class structure, I can't possibly make sure everyone is using perfect technique or following complex choreography safely.

2. Influence.  Often, the hip hop seen in music videos and even dance squads is charged with provocative moves and outfits.  I can't control what ideas kids might have of this genre, and so it's hard to teach appropriate choreography and not disappoint.  Plus, one of my primary goals is to give them creative space, and I don't want the shake-yer-booty moves they have learned elsewhere influencing our time.

3. Exposure.  Hip hop is the most common form of dance most of these kids have experienced.  This being a camp and all, I'd like to offer a taste of the art of dance that they may not know.  It's a chance to broaden their horizons and expose them to something new.

So, surprise or not, we're just doing "dance."  Not hip hop, not ballet, and not really any other specific genre.  This is not going to take the place of a high quality class from a trained and experienced teacher.  It's simply a fun way for them, and I, to use our bodies as instruments - dancing with joy to the song set before us.

technology

"I'm so amazed by phones, Mama."

"Really, why is that?"

"Because you can talk to somebody next door, or a long ways away, and it's all the same on a phone."

so true.

What amazes you today?

day 6

"Love the Lord your God all your soul and with all your strength. 

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 

Impress them on your children. 

Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, 

when you lie down and when you get up."

(thoughts on family values... Deuteronomy 6:5-7)

Decisions.  

I make many each day without much long-term consequence.  Like whether it's better to put the peanut butter knife into the jelly, or vice versa, or just use two knives.  Let's face it, the sandwich-making decision does not change the outcome of our lives.  

Other decisions, however, seem to carry more weight.  Natural, or hydrogenated peanut butter?  Fresh fruit, or fruit snacks?  If you've read many of my food posts, you know I have opinions.  Some have gone as far as giving me nicknames or rolling their eyes.  I admit it - we have values we'd like to instill in our children.  So, the little choices start to add up and show patterns.  If I want my boys to know and follow my beliefs about nutrition, I needn't lecture on health habits.  What will they see as true in my life?  Each small decision can either reinforce or contradict what I say I believe.

The decisions can seem daunting if we put too much stock in their influence.  In writing to share this trip with you, I've been pressed to edit and cram things into short descriptions.  What results is only a tiny glimpse of the week.  Oh, how I long to share the details of the days, describe sweet exchanges, or recount many conversations that changed me!  Yet this blog is only capable of little tales, and my words are so often inadequate.  I've had to choose carefully, hoping that the things I publish will paint a scaled-down version of the larger picture.   

And so we come to this day in Mexico.  Our final day of working with the families in this village is upon us, and I'm thinking about the decision we've made to come here.  Was it a big choice?  So many people - loved ones at home and strangers here - have looked at our choice to bring a family into this work with disbelief or intrigue.  The time, the money, the travel... going where we don't know anyone... where we don't know the language well... when we have no experience, or formal training to offer...  I suppose it seemed like a very large decision, indeed.

It was, and is, a big deal.  But we also realized that this is a small piece of a larger picture.  When we say we believe each person - our children included - is uniquely and lovingly made for God's purposes and glory, then we must act accordingly.  How do we know our own strengths and weaknesses?  How do we show attention to the unique bent of each child, seeking ways to build his character?  What will we do to point him to his creator?  When given the opportunity, we must rise and stretch as a family, living out opportunities God presents with active faith.  

When these choices are consistent, a message will be clear.  There is a God, and we know him.  He is good, and mighty, and purposeful.  He has offered an immeasurable gift of life in Christ, and this life extends beyond the days we number in this world.  He is creative and in motion, and we are invited to join his work in this world.  Often this work is within the rooms of our home, or sidewalks of our neighborhood.   Sometimes it moves us with love and action in our schools, city, and country.  Once in a while - however rare - an invitation extends to take us into other countries and cultures.  

Every parent chooses his or her values.  We value traveling the world, wanting to raise children who see and appreciate the different lives on this planet.  We value hard work, wanting to raise children who will use their gifts to be a blessing, not a drain.  We value sincerity, wanting to raise children who do what they say.  We value faith, wanting to raise children to understand they are not the center of the universe - but they can know the One who is.  Without action, however, these things remain nice words written or spoken without consequence.  It is those small and slightly larger decisions, made with consistency over time, that will prove what we really believe.

Whether it was playing in the heat of the plaza with dozens of children, or sitting in the shade of a dirt courtyard, or trading life stories with new friends, our boys were with us throughout this trip.  Today I watched Obi-1 explain the gospel story to a group that included his brother and several new amigos.  It was unexpected, and I caught my breath.  It's not about regurgitating what he's been told - today I got to overhear what he believes.  For a moment, I simply found joy in a mother's answered prayer.  My children are starting to understand that they have a gift and purpose for their life, and they are acting on this belief. 

Tonight, we joined new friends and prayed a blessing on a family, household, and village.  We shared hopes that people would come and join them this evening.  The results of tonight's attendance will either encourage or squelch this family's dream to build a church in their town.  We have seen people declare a new and renewed faith this week.  We have heard voices say they believe something eternally important.  Like our children's eyes for us and ours for them, we'll look for actions that reinforce those words.

They came.  Tonight, twenty (four times the amount we had asked for and hoped for!) came to hear, read, and discuss a passage from the bible.  Household after household gathered in that courtyard together.  Children gathered around the steps and built new friendships.  Neighbors and friends helped take care of guests, holding babies and greeting each person who climbed that rocky hill in step with their faith.  Translators and team members stood at the outside, offering seating and fellowship space to those who would meet long after we return to our comfy beds and American homes.  

     

So, a decision was made to bring families into this work.  Were we building something?  What did we do with the kids while we worked?  Why were we here?

It's as simple as peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, I suppose.  Somebody was hungry.  Somebody had ideas for a meal.  We believe in providing nourishment to those around us, so we spent a week of a summer vacation in this work.  As we return home, we'll hope and wait for another opportunity to rise up and challenge us to make a decision.

Thank you, as you've supported us and come along in the journey. 

Much love,

MamaToo

day 5

"For everyone who asks receives; 

he who seeks finds; 

and to him who knocks, the door will be opened."

(promise of Jesus, Luke 11:10)

 

Today will end with a bible study at our host's home.  Any bible - regardless of denomination or language - will be useful, as they will take a brief walk through a few scripture passages and discuss it together.  It is a simple, non-threatening introduction to faith, and the hosts will welcome whomever joins them with grace and hospitality.   

While our efforts cover an entire village, our host ministry has a very specific goal: five households at the final bible study meeting.  Ours is not a mission of great revival or conversion; this is not a crusade to make hundreds of people believe like we do.  It is simply the building of a church - a body of people, believing and following Christ - and we are glad helpers to those who have a long-term investment in this place.  A commitment of five households will give our host ministry a "green light," so to speak, to invest time and resources in this community with weekly bible study meetings. With five or more committed and growing in discipleship, they will move forward in planting a church here.

This number seems so easy, but we also recognize the commitment it will take for somebody to come to their neighbors' house for a bible study.  This is not a culture that readily meets together.  The idea of studying the bible, not just displaying it in a corner, surprises and challenges many people we've met.  In order for women or teenagers to attend a meeting, their husbands or fathers will have to approve or join them.  Anyone who comes to a bible study will likely face judgement or skepticism from friends who resist change.  So, we know the goal is set with a solemn heart and faithful prayers.

We spent the day visiting with people in the neighborhood, playing another heated futball match, and presenting a simple but moving drama in the plaza.  Kids, adults, friends, and new faces have been greeting us all day, asking us our story, listening to our hearts, and sharing their lives with us.  Many people have made decisions to welcome Christ's offer of grace and forgiveness and accept His call to discipleship.  It is like seeing fishermen leave their nets - simple, yet profound.  I've never been around this sort of movement, so it is incredible to witness.

While walking over to Angel & Ed's home today, we met a man and his young son outside a store.  The boy is Obi-2's age, which creates an easy conversation for us.  We've met them before, but today we had a chance to visit a bit more.  Mr. Conche has been watching our group, and particularly our family.  He eyes Mr. Kenobi and earnestly asks questions. 

Why would you spend money to come and work here?

You could have gone to a resort.  Why would you plan a vacation like this?

I hear it's about God, but how could religion bring a family with little kids to this place?

Religion.  Yes, it's unlikely that religion would cause us to do this.  If religion is people's effort to get close to the divine, achieve goodness, and find eternal happiness, then this culture (and ours) is rich with religion.  In spite of its simplicity and poverty, these neighborhoods are filled with beautiful art, tributes, and traditions of the religious.  Religion fills the community calendar and creates reason for celebrations.  I'm reminded of the story of Paul's visit to Athens.  Like him, we have not come to introduce our religion.

Religion is fully fueled by the believer.  It is always an expenditure - an effort of people, from their own strength, to give something to another.  No matter who or what the god, religion will only present a new set of rules and behaviors, hoping to bring about change by our own sheer will and discipline.   Religion cannot feed or sustain us.  We might feel better about ourselves, but even that is fleeting.  We might think we can understand, but religion will always leave us striving for more information.   Most of all, religion is only as good as the religious person, and so it often fails and disappoints.  Mr. Conche knows this, so our presence is puzzling.

No, religion would not bring us to this place, especially with our children beside us.  We have no religion to offer - we simply have a relationship that has filled us and overflows.  What we have to offer is not ourselves or our habits.  God has already offered the only way to Himself.  How unbelievable, yet beautiful, for Him to turn religion on its head!  It is not religion, but relationship that has moved us, and this is the story we tell.

Mr. Kenobi continued this conversation with Mr. Conche after the boys and I left for lunch.  When my husband joined us later, he truly glowed from joy.  It seems that throughout their conversation, customers would come in for lunchtime purchases.  Mr. Kenobi and his translator would step back to give Mr. Conche time to do business.  Every time this happened, however, Mr. Conche would waive the customer over to another tienda or a family member, insisting that he wanted to hear more of this gospel story from Mr. Kenobi.  By the end of their time together, Mr. Conche was stepping into a new faith - a relationship built on God's efforts, not his own - and he was eager to join us in study this evening.

And so, this evening a new member of God' family - a man, husband, and father of four boys - joined us.  Mr. Kenobi sat with this new friend and brother, sharing a joy that needed no translator.   

There is much work to do tomorrow.  While we have grateful hearts for the four households who gathered together tonight, several people who indicated they wanted to join us were not there.  Our hosts & ministry leaders seem encouraged, however, and gracious to the Americans who were counting and analyzing.  They explained that many people would rather say they'll come, yet not show up, than refuse an invitation.  This is yet another cultural nuance for us to digest.  Our hosts also remind us of a more solemn problem: there is opposition to change.  Whenever God is at work, there will be challenges to those who are with Him.  This is true, whether in our lighthearted games or genuine conversations.

Tomorrow we will spend our time building the relationships we've begun.  It will be our last day in this place, and we will have another bible study meeting in the evening.   We will continue investing in the new disciples we've found this week, and we pray to see the vision of a small group, growing in relationship with Himself and each other.