Sometimes, I wish my job were as glamorous as I imagined stay-at-home mama life. I pictured loads of free time, sock puppets, finger paints, cookies, and hikes. While we definitely enjoy those things, I now know full-well that bodily functions and household maintenance are a big part of motherhood. There are more than a few things I did not imagine when I was pregnant with my first child.
So today, while looking for a misplaced superhero cape, I was summoned upstairs to hear this:
"Mama, I have a bean in my nose."
Yes, a bean. Remember that child in your preschool class (probably a boy) who had the habit of putting things in his nose? Did you, like I, think he was a bit wierd? Well then, I have a wierd child. Glamorous or not, I just fished a smallish pinto bean out of my son's nostril.
You see, it actually started with a bit of fun. A while back we did a craft project. Musical instruments were made of plastic bottles with a handful of beans inside. When shaken, one could accompany a variety of upbeat songs. The bottle lid was carefully taped shut, so as to avoid any beans spilling out. It was a nice way to recycle a plastic bottle, and a fun instrument for our little band.
I guess I didn't anticipate the bottle breaking. Which, I suppose, is a reasonable thing to expect when a shaker becomes a mallet for the drum. I encourage freedom of expression in our music, but didn't really think through the percussion aspect of our bean shaker. Nor did I realize that the drumming had wounded the shaker with a small hole, just right for beans to trickle out one-at-a-time.
Until my son had a bean in his nose.
What to do? Head to the emergency room? The pediatrician? My neighbor, the nurse?
No, we gathred upstairs in the well-lit bathroom. Holding Obi-2's head in my lap, I carefully used tweezers to pull a varigated pinto bean from his nose. Gross, gross, gross! I then proceeded to sternly tell both boys that nothing - nothing - ever goes up one's nose. Not fingers, not toys, and certainly not beans! Furthermore, I assured them, if it happened again, we might end up at the hospital, where doctors and nurses might have to cut open the boy's nose to get it out. (I followed this lecture with a nice auto-deposit into their "future therapy" fund.)
And so, lest you think that life of a stay-at-home mama is full of bon bons and craft projects, just remember the true glamour is at the end of a pair of tweezers.
4 comments:
It happened to you! I've heard about those stories, but it's funny to hear them from friends! Sorry ;) hee hee (Doesn't it hurt when foreign objects are lodged inside your nostril?)
Hope you guys are doing well (outside of the bean world)! I enjoy reading your stories.
Be thankful that he told you about it. My Barbie had a golf set that came with a very little ball and where did my brother put it?????Yep you guessed it, up his nose and told no-one. A week later there was a trip to the hospital, local anesthetic and lots of screaming to retrive it. I remember I was eight at the time and he was five. We are both now 39 and 36 and I still remind him.
Much love
Aussie Mom
Sorry, but heh heh heh heh heh. My son put what he calls a "moth ball" up his nose. (They're those round, tiny, brightly-colored pieces of plastic kids find on the sidewalks, in the gutter and at the park.) (Why? Where do they come from?)
Yes, my son picked up something out of the gutter and stuck it up his nose. Didn't tell us. Sneezed it out a week later. Or two weeks, hard to know. His quote was, "I stuck that up there a looooooooong time ago."
how good to hear from other moms who can laugh with (at?) me and share their own experiences... yes, this too shall pass!
I'm not sure if I'm glad to know it could've been worse, but I am thankful for how it ended.
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